Wednesday, December 28, 2011

All that I didn't accomplish in 2011

Seems like every goal I set for myself in 2011 fell short. I wanted to blog more (obviously didn't make that one), wanted to lose 50 lbs (nope), tried to keep up with my ORT jar (I think I participated for the first 3 months, and then gave up), have several WIP's that I didn't even work on (hence, the reason for the empty ORT Jar). My book goal was 144 books, which I surpassed in 2010 with no problems, but this year came up short. I think I am at about 130 books. I know-more than the average reader, but still, didn't make the goal.

I am trying to decide why I put all this pressure on myself to meet these goals. I have never been competitive in anything, so maybe these goals are a way to compete with others. But I am realizing that I don't like the pressure of trying to best others, and am uncomfortable when I succeed and people praise me. It's that whole low self-esteem thing.

This last year has been a doozy. My husband has worked at 3 jobs. My daughter graduated high school and started taking classes at the local community college. My health has nose-dived.

In fact-the day after Thanksgiving, I was in the ER for chest pains. I thought I was having a heart attack. Ended up not being one, but not sure what the pain was coming from. Then, I got poisoned by gluten at Round Table Pizza-their blue cheese salad dressing has gluten in it! I was sick for over a week, and even now I am not fully 100%. I have become very sensitive to any gluten, even if it is just cross contamination, and think I might have more food allergies/sensitivity.

I feel like I have spent the last year at work, or in bed. I work a full time job, and when I come home, I just want to lay down. My primary care doctor would like me to take some time off (short time disability), but I haven't decided whether I want to do that yet. I just feel angry!

I have tried to set some goals for 2012. I signed up for the 15 new projects for crazy January. I think I am going to have back out of that one. I don't have the drive or the money to kit up 15 new things, especially if I don't have the time to even work on them. I would like to try the WIP Apocalypse, but I know I won't do it. I need to learn to meditate-sounds stupid, but I really think it will help with my health and my stress level.

So, I think the logical thing to do, is try and push for losing some weight-it probably won't be 50 pounds, but even if it is 20, it will make me healthier. And I know I can do the 100 book challenge, just because I read a lot. As far as the stitching goes-work on what I love, and stop worrying about all the charts and WIP's I have that I am not working on. It's okay to not stitch something, if you don't love it anymore. And it's okay to buy a new chart here and there because you do love it. Just like it's okay to stop reading a book after the first 50 pages, because you hate it.

So there you go-goals for 2012. Lose a pound or 2, stitch a few things that I enjoy, read the books I enjoy, and learn some meditation and maybe even some yoga!

Okay-that's enough, or I will stress out!

Here is a picture of my 2 kids and my sister's 2. My kids are the freakishly short ones, and her's are the freakishly tall ones. And I love them all!


Measi said...

Hi Susan -

2011 was a rough year, but hopefully 2012 will be better.

I think you have the right attitude about your stitching - work on what you love. You might even find some meditation within your stitching (I know I do).

Thanks for joining up for the WIPocalypse for next year - and don't worry about how much you accomplish. Just enjoy stitching, regardless of the pace - because *that's* the point of the SAL. :)

Happy New Year!

Dani - tkdchick said...

I hope 2012 looks up for you. Speaking from personal experience make the weight loss goal your first and only focus! About 4 years ago I joined Weight Watchers and managed to loose the 63 extra pounds I was carrying. I would recommend the program to anyone, it's totally flexible to you and your life, but only if you're willing to commit to it 100%. If you kinda sorta try to loose weight you get kinda sorta results. Don't look at the big picture, do this 5 lbs at a time and each pound you take off and keep off is a huge victory! Find ways to reward yourself that aren't food!

Eating less and moving more is the key to loosing weight!

TinaTx said...

Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and leaving a comment! TSO was an awesome show. Like I said in the post, Timothy has been several times (which is how we got such good seats - he is on their fan list and we got tickets before they went on sale to the general public) It was our first time and we had no idea what to expect!
I hope 2012 is a better year for you - for me too! I tend to not make goal lists on paper, but I can't seem to help mentally making them and of course I am always disappointed when I don't meet them. I need to learn not to do that!